I began the task of putting to paper the painful remembering of my past in 2003 in a book entitled "Stirrings From Inside". What began as an abstract artful presentation of my life’s journey has become much more detailed than I ever thought I could share. It was an excruciating task to be sure. There are numerous reasons I felt compelled to write it down. The greatest being the hope I wish to share with anyone who has been through what seems insurmountable circumstances and tragedy. There is hope and restoration through any situation we might have had to endure. My journey has taken me from butterfly, to caterpillar, to my self-imposed chrysalis and back. My story is one of victory over violence.
I am a survivor of a lifetime of abuse issues. The abuse began when I was very young. My parents were children themselves when I was born. Alcohol abuse, among other issues caused their divorce when I was only 3 years old. I was born and raised in Dallas, Texas. I was sexually molested by a close family member when I was 6 years old. That set me up for multiple sexual issues and traumas.
I became pregnant the first time at 15 and had 3 amazing children whom I lost in a nasty divorce. Years of guilt and self condemnation issues sent me reeling for a very long time. I eventually put myself through cosmetology school and became a hairstylist to support my dream of being a full-time musician/artist. At the request of my Mom during a family crisis I moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma (my step-brother had overdosed and died and my step-dad became seriously suicidal and eventually killed himself in our garage). I lived in Tulsa for 18 years. I have been in 4 volatile marriages, the last one almost ended me. Narcissism is a very real and scary mental health issue. I've battled PTSD, depression, anxiety, and chronic pain for much of my life.
I began writing poetry as a young girl, took piano lessons from second through fourth grade, then taught myself to play guitar and began writing songs by age 13. Poetry, Art and Music became my way of escape, my therapy, and eventually my path back to God.